Since ex-wife Chikwendu knows the way to his heart, FFK says his life in danger of food poisoning

As Chikwendu Fani-Kayode told a court in Abuja on Friday all the agonies of love she enjoyed while she warmed the pillow for Nigeria’s foremost freelance evangelist and politician, the respondent, the he-man himself, has corroborated her story. In a statement on Saturday, Femi Fani-Kayode described their good old days of coupling as memorable: horsing … Read moreSince ex-wife Chikwendu knows the way to his heart, FFK says his life in danger of food poisoning

COVID-19: After meeting Yahaya Bello, OBJ, 84, boasts he’s yet to test positive for conspiracy theories

Days after meeting Kogi Gov Yahaya Bello, former President Olusegun Obasanjo has declared his covid-19 status. Many had been worried the old man could be infected with a variant of the virus that is resistant to fact and science after the duo stood arm to arm, with no mask on last week. But the 84 … Read moreCOVID-19: After meeting Yahaya Bello, OBJ, 84, boasts he’s yet to test positive for conspiracy theories

Matawalle: Except they repent, bandits won’t be able to operate in Zamfara again

Zamfara government has announced the signing into law an order allowing only repentant bandits to operate freely in the state. The law is coming on the heels of success gilding the effort of repentant bandits operating in the state. “If not for the activity of these repentant bandits in securing the release of the hundreds … Read moreMatawalle: Except they repent, bandits won’t be able to operate in Zamfara again

Matawalle disappointed Biden, others not shocked when he revealed night guard orchestrated schoolgirls kidnap in Zamfara

Zamfara Gov. Bello Matawalle has expressed disappointment in the way world leaders deadpanned when he revealed the men of power behind banditry in the state. On receiving the 270-something girls some unrepentant bandits kidnapped last Friday—thanks to the effort of the law-abiding bandits—the supreme-court governor promised to shock the planet by revealing those behind the … Read moreMatawalle disappointed Biden, others not shocked when he revealed night guard orchestrated schoolgirls kidnap in Zamfara

PDP: Buhari barring flies in Zamfara is ruse by APC to intimidate, sweep ruling PDP out

The PDP national headquarters has reacted to President Muhammadu Buhari’s no-fly-zone order placed on Zamfara in the efforts to contain widespread kidnapping and banditry in the state. The federal government made the decision following the revelation by Gov Bello Matawalle that the forest-dwelling kidnappers of Jangebe schoolgirls have flies on the wall right in Gusau. … Read morePDP: Buhari barring flies in Zamfara is ruse by APC to intimidate, sweep ruling PDP out

Bala, Ortom reconcile, agree only criminal herdsman ditches pump-action for AK-47 assault rifle in self-defense

After lobbing brickbats against each other, PDP Govs Samuel Ortom and Bala Mohammed shared a hug before their Rivers counterpart Nyesome Wike on March 2. Their problem started weeks ago when Mohamed claimed Fulani herders armed with AK-47 rifles are merely defending themselves against amotekun and other fleshing-eating predators in forests across the southwest. In … Read moreBala, Ortom reconcile, agree only criminal herdsman ditches pump-action for AK-47 assault rifle in self-defense

Buhari warns only bandits carrying human shields will be spared military attacks in 2023

As bandits run wild and free in the northwest kidnapping schoolchildren and travelers, President Muhammadu Buhari has explained what is holding him back. In a press statement his media adviser Garba Sheu issued on the weekend, the president warned the bandits not to feel smug in any way. “No criminal group can be too strong … Read moreBuhari warns only bandits carrying human shields will be spared military attacks in 2023

Gumi confirms his law-abiding bandits not responsible for Jangebe schoolgirls kidnap  

Islamic scholar Sheikh Gumi has confirmed the group of kidnappers who carted away 300 school girls in Zamfara on Friday are non-bandits because the  group he knows  are law-abiding. According to him, the legitimate bandits have told him the bastards that kidnapped the young girls are not part of them. “I learnt that group of … Read moreGumi confirms his law-abiding bandits not responsible for Jangebe schoolgirls kidnap  

NDLEA invites Gov. Ikpeazu for blood sugar-level test, suspects enhanced performance in Abia

Abia Gov. Okezie Ikepazu and APC Kogi West Sen. S. Adeyemi have been at war over who has been performing like a drunk between the two politicians. The question will soon be settled as NDLEA wades uninvited into the dispute which originated on the Senate floor early in the week. What further heightened the NDLEA … Read moreNDLEA invites Gov. Ikpeazu for blood sugar-level test, suspects enhanced performance in Abia

2023: Saraki leads PDP committee to consult evil spirit on far-away hill 50,000 feet high; APC says it’s height of desperation

As parties prepare for the 2023 general elections, the main opposition PDP is doubling down on spiritual efforts to ensure it comes back to power after eight years on the fringe. So its chairman of reconciliation committee and former Senate President Bukola Saraki took some members to a necromancer living up a mountain in Minna, … Read more2023: Saraki leads PDP committee to consult evil spirit on far-away hill 50,000 feet high; APC says it’s height of desperation

Hungry lion makes angry noise that sounds like roaring—Study

Behavioral scientists from the American University of Nigeria have published a 10-year study which reveals the psychology of the lion, an animal many believe is the strongest in the wild. The leader of the team of five in a paper published on conclusion of the study revealed that lions are not always strong. “They are … Read moreHungry lion makes angry noise that sounds like roaring—Study

Fear grips Aregbesola as killers who worked for Oyetola victory in 2018 trace minister to party for payback

Interior Minister Rauf Aregbesola is all jitters now as the ongoing APC membership invalidation turns out to be a harbinger of fatal payback playing hell with his mind. “Oh, how democracy sucks.  It allows killers, hoodlums, terminators, and all sorts to join parties,” the minister lamented roughly on Saturday, insisting such membership must not be … Read moreFear grips Aregbesola as killers who worked for Oyetola victory in 2018 trace minister to party for payback

Governor assures law-abiding bandits of constitutional protection, benefits as long as they pay tax, obey traffic laws, others

Zamfara’s Gov. Bello Matawalle has warned Nigerians to react with caution when they hear bandits rocking the news. According to him, law-abiding bandits, mostly operating in the forest of Zamfara, don’t deserve such negative publicity and reaction. “Nigerians should understand not all bandits are criminals, and I have assured the law-abiding ones among the bandits … Read moreGovernor assures law-abiding bandits of constitutional protection, benefits as long as they pay tax, obey traffic laws, others

Secondus embarks on one-man march from Wadata Plaza to Adamawa in protest against his removal

Embattled PDP’s Chairman Uche Secondus has announced the date he will embark on a one-man protest against the party’s National Working Committee planning to remove him from office. Going by the NWC Tuesday meeting where a long list of Secondus’ sins was reeled out, the party is set to rat on their chairman who led … Read moreSecondus embarks on one-man march from Wadata Plaza to Adamawa in protest against his removal

REJOINDER: Bala okays herdsman carrying AK-47 to defend Constitution, self against amotekun, other predators

After the uproar that greeted the gum-beating by PDP’s Bauchi Gov. Mohammed Bala on AK-47 guns in the arms of Fulani herders, his media handlers decided to listen to the gum beating again and again. They then teased out what their boss said which the Nigerian media didn’t hear: Bala supported herdsmen carrying AK-47, quite … Read moreREJOINDER: Bala okays herdsman carrying AK-47 to defend Constitution, self against amotekun, other predators

DEFECTION: APC rejects Fani-Kayode application, says male defector must be in stable relationship

After cursing President Muhammadu Buhari, the Fulani tribe, Muslims, and V.P Yemi Osinbajo for six years, PDP’s bottom-of-the-pants stalwart and evangelist Femi Fani-Kayode decided to cross over in a manner that made him look stupid by half. And he failed. And failed. And failed. According to Salihu Lukman, Fani-Kayode went round to play PDP’s dirty … Read moreDEFECTION: APC rejects Fani-Kayode application, says male defector must be in stable relationship

BREAKING: DSS nabs Marclar, Cathar, 90 other aliens brought in unmarked aircraft to protest in Lagos

Few hours to its kick-off, the Occupy Lekki Toll Gate protest might be up to a rocky start, and its objectives will be hanging in the balance. Info Minister Lai Mohammed hinted Thursday the federal government won’t watch the ENDSARS activists disrupt Lagos again, having informed all security agencies, including Amotekun, to be on the … Read moreBREAKING: DSS nabs Marclar, Cathar, 90 other aliens brought in unmarked aircraft to protest in Lagos

Buhari orders maximum perimeter security for protesters as they #Occupy Lekki Toll Gate on Twitter

The federal government is set to shock the world as ENDSARS activists mobilize for another protest following the re-opening of the Lekki Toll Gate, Lagos. The toll facility was described by the Amnesty International as the killing field where no fewer than 78, or and 32, or and 20, or and seven, or and two … Read moreBuhari orders maximum perimeter security for protesters as they #Occupy Lekki Toll Gate on Twitter

Fani-Kayode joins Osinbajo in APC to propagate gospel

Evangelist Jesufemi Fani-Kayode has grasped the nettle, and headed in to the APC to join in the furthering the great commission of the Prince amidst spiraling insecurity in the country. The PDP loafer was received by Govs Yahaya Bello and Mai Buni on Tuesday. Some of his detractors wonder why the ruling APC will welcome … Read moreFani-Kayode joins Osinbajo in APC to propagate gospel

NASS proposes bill to confer Temerity Award on Obaseki, other govs who demonstrate sharp-sightedness

A bill has originated in the Nigerian Senate seeking to recognize elected political office holders whose courage and integrity appear so strong they obey their guilty conscience as they see their own corruption. The bill, according to its sponsor, will make it a law that an honor, named the Temerity Award, will be conferred on … Read moreNASS proposes bill to confer Temerity Award on Obaseki, other govs who demonstrate sharp-sightedness

Ekiti recovers Michelangelo’s painting of JFK from Venice museum; state website crashes after 200 million views

To sell their candidate and Gov. JFK in the 2023 presidential election, the Ekiti APC has recovered an oil painting of the governor which the great renaissance painter Michelangelo made for the Ekiti man in 1800. “With this painting, certainly, our own JFK has won the 2023 presidency—because voters look outwards,” said Fayemi’s campaign spokesman … Read moreEkiti recovers Michelangelo’s painting of JFK from Venice museum; state website crashes after 200 million views

Nigeria’s corruption perception improves -20 places after CBN banned kleptocurrency dealers in PDP

While, to many, it sounds silly the CBN bans the occult transactions in digital currencies  by the PDP and the lone wolves terrorizing Nigeria, the decision has become a boost for the APC and the presidency. Following the quick-fire order to all financial institutions—to reject any transaction in Bitcoins, and other digital currencies, and tell … Read moreNigeria’s corruption perception improves -20 places after CBN banned kleptocurrency dealers in PDP

Sunday Igboho struck with Fehlleistung, cries to Ooni for pardon

Sunday Adeyemo has hit a low after a spell of fame and fortune he got for freezing out Fulani crime lords in Oyo, and daring to call Ooni of Ife Adeyeye Ogunwusi a Fulani ass-licker. Earlier, Adeyemo, aka Sunday Igboho, claimed he saw with his third eye how the monarch collected a busload of dollars … Read moreSunday Igboho struck with Fehlleistung, cries to Ooni for pardon

TERRORISM: Nigeria vows to help Mozambique defeat security

With 12 years’ experience killing Boko Haram leader Abubakr Sheku over and again, and strategically retreating from terrorists-occupied LGAs in Borno, the Nigerian military  has offered to free Mozambique writhing in the grip of terrorists. Foreign Affairs Minister Geoffrey Onyeama stated this when he visited Mozambique’s Prime Minister Carlos Agostinho do Rosário  on the weekend … Read moreTERRORISM: Nigeria vows to help Mozambique defeat security

BREAKING: Court declares El-Rufai winner of 2023 presidential election; APC reacts

A Kaduna state high court has proven the independence of the nation’s judiciary by declaring Gov. Nasir El- Rufai winner of the 2023 presidential election. “Indeed President Muhammadu Buhari has done what no president has ever done by allowing the lower court justice to write and read his judgement without let or hindrance,” said APC’s … Read moreBREAKING: Court declares El-Rufai winner of 2023 presidential election; APC reacts

Presidency raises the alarm over Nigerian newspapers going to press, carrying on like media

President Muhammadu Buhari’s media aide has alerted the global community on how Nigeria’s free press operates—like those in the US and the UK. “Look at them—the 11 of them still publishing! Their journalists are filing their stories, and production managers going to print shop,” said Femi Adesina, presidential senior media aide (II). “No….This is unfair … Read morePresidency raises the alarm over Nigerian newspapers going to press, carrying on like media

AG: Nigerian elite violate same-sex law for harassing President Buhari

For six years, President Muhammadu Buhari said he has endured all kinds of men of caliber hitting on him for practically no reason other than the fact that he’s just a man. He’s hurting now. Especially as the supposed elite Nigerians criticizing him blink over all the snazzy things he and his APC administration claim … Read moreAG: Nigerian elite violate same-sex law for harassing President Buhari

Gun-slinging federal lawmaker using Allah’s powers robs unsuspecting robbers of valuables at kill zone

  Things went pear-shaped between a federal lawmaker and a bunch of armed robbers in Sokoto Jan 29. But the standoff was finally resolved in favor of the side that fired in the name of Allah—the one-man battalion Hon. Abdullahi Salame. On his knee doing the first Dua prayer, the Sokoto lawmaker said he took … Read moreGun-slinging federal lawmaker using Allah’s powers robs unsuspecting robbers of valuables at kill zone

LAMIDO: Buhari unfriends Tinubu, unfollows Fashola, blocks Osinbajo, as third-term agenda thickens

Riffing on the old political cliché “No permanent friend or enemy but permanent interests”,  PDP chieftain Sule Lamido has told Nigerians, for free, what President Muhammadu Buhari has up his sleeves as 2023 presidential election approaches. The former Jigawa governor said the election consultancy APC leader Bola Tinubu undertook for Buhari has expired, and the … Read moreLAMIDO: Buhari unfriends Tinubu, unfollows Fashola, blocks Osinbajo, as third-term agenda thickens

DEFECTION: Fayose stands his ground, vows he’ll never cross to APC like others do with razzmatazz

Members of the opposition at the federal and state levels keep diving into the APC ahead of the 2022 and 2023 elections, in faithfulness to their vow never to leave their party in critical times. But PDP’s blowhard and Ekiti ex-Gov Ayo Fayose is feeling it specially. One of his closest associates, Tope Aluko, just … Read moreDEFECTION: Fayose stands his ground, vows he’ll never cross to APC like others do with razzmatazz